For example, if you write a book about managing money, it would be great to tell a story about how you filed for bankruptcy. That\u2019s a hard thing to admit, and is a vulnerable thing to say in a book.<\/p>\n
Telling that story in a book about managing money will greatly benefit the reader. It will make them trust you, and you will seem credible because you let them know that you\u2019ve been there and can help them get over their shame and their issues of money.<\/p>\n
But if the book is about knitting, I\u2019m not sure how much sense it makes to talk about bankruptcy. That doesn\u2019t get the reader anything. In that case, it feels like an emotional release for the author, but irrelevant to the reader.<\/p>\n
Your book should never be a place for you to dump your emotions on the reader. If writing the book is therapy for you, that\u2019s okay. But you should not ask the reader to be your therapist.<\/p>\n
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Think about it like any sort of sharing with a friend. If your friend has a bad day and tells you about it, you listen and empathize. Then if you had a bad day, you share that as well. You\u2019re sharing, you\u2019re empathizing with each other, that\u2019s okay, right?<\/p>\n
But if you just talk about all of your problems, and then once they start talking, you get up and leave\u2014that\u2019s not empathizing. That\u2019s dumping.<\/p>\n
There is a big difference.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n
There is one last thing I\u2019d recommend though: speak from your scars, not your open wounds.<\/p>\n
Meaning, don\u2019t put stuff in your book that you haven\u2019t worked through. Your book is for sharing what you know, not working through things you haven\u2019t processed yet.<\/p>\n
Even if you process by writing, that\u2019s OK, just make sure what goes in the book is hard-earned wisdom, not emotional release that only serves you.<\/p>\n
Showing emotion\u2014especially in writing\u2014can be very hard. I can\u2019t tell you how many times we\u2019ve worked with authors and they describe a horrific scene\u2014some sort of major trauma\u2014with total detachment.<\/p>\n
Maybe they had a bankruptcy where they lost everything, or they had someone in their family die, or they lost a business to a cheating partner, and we\u2019ll hear them talk about this and they\u2019ll just describe the facts. They won\u2019t talk about how they felt or how it affected them.<\/p>\n
We\u2019ll push these authors to then talk about their feelings. When that happened, what did you feel? What was it like? How did it affect you?<\/p>\n
If you are going to tell stories like that, then you should absolutely talk about your emotions, to the extent that it is relevant.<\/p>\n
In fact, for many authors, we have to first tell them that their story deeply impacts us, before they give themselves permission to talk about their emotions and feelings.<\/p>\n
And when you do that as an author, you give the reader the permission to feel that emotion and engage with that emotion. Which is what you\u2019re trying to accomplish with your book.<\/p>\n
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You are not there as an author to just give the facts. Facts are great. Facts are important, facts are the bedrock of your book\u2014but people don\u2019t learn through facts and people don\u2019t engage through facts.<\/p>\n
People learn through story and example. They make decisions about how to change their life with emotion. And that\u2019s what you need to do to have a great book. It\u2019s got to have both of those things in it.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n
If you\u2019re unsure about this, answer these questions:<\/p>\n
What\u2019s your favorite book?<\/p>\n
What is your favorite part about your favorite book? What was the thing that impacted you the most?<\/p>\n
Right now you\u2019re probably thinking about a part that was a profound in the book that elicited a deep emotion in you.<\/p>\n
It wasn\u2019t a fact. It was a story or an anecdote or a scene that brought something up in you.<\/p>\n
Do the same thing with your book. Tell stories and anecdotes that elicit emotion, because that will draw the reader in and make the facts stick to their brain.<\/p>\n
The more you show the ugly stuff, the more you say the things that everyone thinks and no one says, the more you show your true self and true thoughts\u2014the better your book will be.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Every author struggles with how much of their personal story should be in their book. Some want to put a lot of their story in their book. Others don\u2019t want…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":28,"featured_media":17092,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[236,237],"goal":[],"fear":[],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n
How Much of Your Story Should Be in Your Book?<\/title>\n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n \n\t \n\t \n\t \n \n \n \n \n \n \n\t \n\t \n\t \n