Jackie Eubanks: Episode 751

Transcript

[0:00:28] BB: Jackie and Cody had only been married a year when they got the diagnosis. Their businesses were looking up, they were trying to start a family, life was going well for this happy couple and then they found out that Cody had cancer. A few days before receiving the official diagnosis, Jackie felt called to pray. Kneeling over her sleeping husband, she called out to God. As she wept, Cody opened his eyes and said, clear as day, “I hear you.” The next morning, he had no memory of the event but they knew that God was with them. As Cody moved closer to heaven, their faith grew even stronger and the message that they felt in their hearts. “Even as you walk through your lowest valley, you are not alone.” This is the message of My Cody: His Cancer, our Faith and God’s Love. This is the Author Hour Podcast. My name is Benjie Bach and I’m excited to be joined today by Jackie Eubanks. She is the author of a new book, My Cody: His Cancer, Our Faith and God’s Love. Jackie, welcome to the show.

[0:01:32] Jackie Eubanks: Hi Benjie, thanks so much for having me. I’m excited to sit down and be talking to you.

[0:01:37] BB: Yeah, we’re excited to have you. Jackie, can you give listeners just a brief introduction, tell us a little bit about yourself and where you are these days?

[0:01:44] Jackie Eubanks: Yes. I currently live in Bowling Green, Kentucky. I’m a licensed real estate professional, I work with Next Home Realty Experts. I am one of five siblings, I’m the second oldest in my family. They actually all lived down in Marietta so I am flying here solo at the moment. I wrote this book because I am a recent widow. My husband got diagnosed with cancer around this time last year and this was just kind of my way of grieving and dealing with the loss of him. In my spare time, I’ve just been writing away.

[0:02:20] BB: Wow, yeah and I do want to say upfront, we’re going to cover some heavy topics as this was part of you processing grief and we just want to say sorry for your loss and thank you for choosing to share this with the world.

[0:02:32] Jackie Eubanks: Thanks for having me, I really appreciate it and I’m excited for people to know more about his story and our story and just the journey we went through together.

[0:02:41] BB: Absolutely, let me ask you this because in the preface of the book, you said that this book kind of saved you from sinking into a deep depression that the writing of this book and this process. Did you have an audience in mind outside of just yourself where you’re kind of going, “I need to process this” who were you thinking this book would be good for as you share it with the world?

[0:03:02] Jackie Eubanks: Actually, I just had this conversation last night with my older sister. We were in the kitchen, we were up really late and we were just talking. This book was actually written for me, I didn’t really have an audience in mind when I was writing it and crazy back story, about two months into Cody getting diagnosed, I looked at him one night and I said, “Babe, I’m going to turn our story into a book” and he’s like, “What?” because I’ve always been a diary keeper. I’ve always written in journals, I’ve always just documented my days, if the Lord reveals something to me, I jot it down, I’m notorious for keeping a whole bunch of napkins in my bedroom side table because just notes throughout the day, you know? I just grab whatever I can find and jot it down so I don’t lose my train of thought. Anyways, yeah, I told him I was going to write a book about our story and it was going to be the happily ever after that everyone looks forward to hearing about and he was going to kick cancer in the tail and we were just going to seize the day type of thing and it just wasn’t the outcome that I had hoped. When he passed, I was like, “There is no way I’ll continue writing like this story would really suck.” I think it was a day or two after he passed, I just felt the Lord saying, “Someone needs to hear this story. If no one else needs to hear it, you need to continue writing it.” I kid you not, for four months after he passed, everybody was wondering what I was doing with my time, how I was coping, what was going on and the majority of my time was spent in my room, in the dark, on my phone because I wrote the book on my phone. I downloaded some type of journaling app or whatever and I literally just sat there and wrote. I had my notebook to the side of me and I just jotted down things and yes, after four months, I was just wrapping up this book.

[0:04:53] BB: That’s incredible. Well, let’s take the next few minutes then to dive into that story. Let’s rewind all the way back to you and Cody first meeting. Just tell us a little bit about the development of your relationship.

[0:05:08] Jackie Eubanks: Yeah, so another just really beautiful story. Cody and I met one afternoon, we were both volunteering for our old high schools, we were both track and field athletes, crazy story but I actually got in a car accident right before I met Cody. 30 minutes maybe, 45 minutes before I met Cody, I got into probably the worst accident I could have been in. No one was hurt, thank you Jesus, it was incredible, I got rear ended by a guy just flying around the corner and my car swerved into oncoming traffic and it was crazy that I didn’t hit the other drivers, there was like three or four people in that lane and anyway, something took the wheel and I peacefully landed in a field. My parents, ambulance, firefighters, everybody just kind of flooded the scene and my parents were like, “You need to go to the ER, you need to go get checked out. Make sure you're not concussed” or whatever. I said, “You know? I just have to be at this track meet, I don’t know what it is but I’m supposed to be there.” Of course, the whole way there, my dad drove me. The whole way there, he’s like, “Let’s just go to the hospital.” I was just being pretty stubborn, I was like, “I’m not going” I get to the track and the meet had kind of begun without me. I just go take a seat next to my athletes over at the long jump pit and I’m sitting there and I’m like, “Man, I hate to admit it but my dad was right, I need to go to the ER.” As I’m sitting there just kind of like replaying what just happened, Cody walks up to me and he’s just smiling ear to ear, very approachable, very friendly and I stand up, shake his hand, we introduce each other or ourselves and yeah, that was the beginning of how we met but he was volunteering for his team, I was volunteering for my team. It’s funny now because neither of us ever volunteered after that, we just kind of met each other and we’re like, okay.

[0:07:00] BB: That’s amazing.

[0:07:01] Jackie Eubanks: Yeah, we knew in that season that that’s why we were supposed to be doing what we’re supposed to be doing. I mean, that’s how we met.

[0:07:09] BB: Wow, I mean that day is memorable for so many reasons and –

[0:07:12] Jackie Eubanks: It really is. Satan was trying to come in and destroy a good thing before it could even get started but I knew I was supposed to be there and that was confirmed. Of course, we didn’t start seeing each other until like a month or so down the road but I remember that initial meeting very perfectly.

[0:07:28] BB: Okay, it starts off well, down the road, you guys end up getting married, about a year into your marriage and Cody’s health has taken a turn for the worse. What are some of those first signs that he was getting sick and what was that time like for you guys as a couple?

[0:07:45] Jackie Eubanks: Well, you know, looking back at it, closer to our wedding, June 1st of 2019, I noticed in his bachelor’s for sure, his groomsman, they noticed he wasn’t drinking with like the festivities and stuff. He was just always complaining of acid reflux and again, that’s just a small detail now that makes a whole lot of sense but around our wedding in June, he just wasn’t drinking. He wasn’t as lively as I figured he would be as far as – I don’t know, he’s just a really fun guy and not saying he wasn’t fun but there was just subtle signs to show that he wasn’t well. Then in the fall of 2019, he didn’t really have specific symptoms but he was just complaining of achiness and just didn’t feel himself and all of that, just feeling off. He went to the doctor twice in the fall and in the winter and they just said, “You’re fine, go home.” Then, at the beginning of 2020, he went again and the guy was like, “You're fine, go home.” He sought out a different doctor and like, winter, spring, March, April-ish and all the specific dates are in the book. Yeah, he was just complaining about acid reflux and not feeling himself and I believe it was early April or late April, somewhere in April, he noticed a protrusion coming out of his abdomen and it just freaked us both out, probably me more than him. He was this super composed guy, he just held it together really well. I mean, he had won a poker game all day every day but yeah, we noticed that protrusion and we just didn’t know what to expect but around that time, COVID was going crazy around the world and unless you had COVID symptoms, you weren’t getting in to see a doctor. They couldn’t get him in until late May and of course, biopsy came back alter and yeah, it was kind of history but called it much too late. I mean, no telling how long that would was brewing because by the time you see a protrusion like that, they told us, it was caught way too late.

[0:09:55] BB: Well, there is a night where you were praying over Cody that as I was reading it, it felt like that kind of even maybe prompted part of this book because it was this powerful God moment I would say. Tell me about that?

[0:10:09] Jackie Eubanks: I don’t know if it was the night of or the night after but it was the day he had his biopsy and I didn’t mention this part in the book but there was a doctor at the medical center named Dr. Lindsey and that conversation will forever stand out to me. Cody’s all loopy and doped up on whatever they gave him to kind of numb him so they could do the biopsy and Dr. Lindsey, it was just – it was incredible really. He had logged out or clocked out and then came back into Cody and I’s room and he sat with me and Cody for at least an hour and just could’ve talk to us about what he felt was going on. It was really cool he wanted to get to know us, he wanted to get to know our story and he just looked at me and he said, “Jackie, I can tell you’re a really strong girl, you’ve got a long road ahead of you. Cody is not okay.” He told me right there, “Cody probably wouldn’t make it” he didn’t know the specifics of what it was or the exact type of cancer, he didn’t know but he said, “I’ve seen this before, Cody’s liver is way bigger than it needs to be, this cancer is more aggressive than I’ve seen in a lot of other cancers” and of course, he was very careful about saying cancer, he was 99.9% sure it was cancer but he couldn’t come out and tell me it was until he got that results back but he was basically saying, “Whatever this is, Cody’s not going to make it” in really careful words. That night, we get home. Cody actually threw up that night, two guys from small group came over and kind of helped him, was checking on us and everything and when Cody and I went up to bed. Okay, I guess, now, replaying it, it probably was that same day but I couldn’t go to sleep. I just couldn’t, Cody was sleeping peacefully and so, we would just kind of play the TV in the background to help us go to sleep. I paused the TV, sat up, put my hands on him and I just started praying but I couldn’t really pray because I didn’t know what to pray for. I didn’t know what was going on and what this was, I was scared by what the doctor was telling me. I was scared that he was throwing up and I was just terrified really. I just started praying and it’s just, ironic is probably the wrong word to use here but it’s really a miracle that the Lord revealed himself to us so soon before anything really kicked off and got started.

[0:12:40] BB: Yeah, there’s this moment where Cody doesn’t remember saying something, is that right?

[0:12:46] Jackie Eubanks: Yeah. It was crazy. I was sitting there praying over him and of course, I’m just dry heaving probably and I was trying to be quiet, I couldn’t really be quiet and I heard his head like readjust on his pillow and I opened my eyes and look and he’s staring at me and I’m like, “Oh, man.” I’m kind of startled, I jump back a little bit and I’m like, “Oh, I’m sorry” You know? He’s like, “I hear you” and I was like, “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t, you know, go back to sleep, I apologize, I’ll go to bed now” He just subtly closed his eyes and resumed snoring and I was like, “Well, that was weird” and the next morning, I go down stairs, I find him, he was studying for a really important test at the time and so I go downstairs and I just started apologizing for waking him up and I know how scary that must have been for me to be hunched over him praying while he was sound asleep. He had no clue what I was talking about, not a single clue and we both were just in chills about that. I mean, that was crazy. It was like the Lord was speaking through him to me. “I hear you, I hear your request, even though you may not know what to pray for right now, I know the desires of your heart, I’m with you, I hear you, you’re loved.”

[0:14:04] BB: Yeah, wow, that is quite a series of events and I love the texture and color you added with the empathy and the honesty of the doctor. I think that’s got to be such a tough job to walk with a couple through those moments and then to come home and have, kind of be processing that and have that sort of God moment in that season. It kicks off then a series of unfortunate, you know, the diagnosis continues to progress and move on where – give us an idea of what that timeline was like. It wasn’t a very long period of time from sort of diagnosis on, was it?

[0:14:44] Jackie Eubanks: No, he passed four months after diagnosis, which it all just feels so quick. I still have a tough time processing it. Writing this book helped me slow down what really happened, it helped me relive everything. This interview is actually really great right now because I’m reliving it and I love talking about it out loud because it does help more than some would realize. I guess, you know, unique, I mean grieving is so unique that some people don’t want to talk about it, some people do, some people just want to bury it and some people want to bring it to light and so I guess, my way of grieving is to talk about it, is to share, is to keep his legacy going and so, back to your original question. Yeah, it wasn’t long at all, everything just happened so quickly but a part of me feels like Cody knew it wasn’t what – he wasn’t going to make it because he had everything in place. I mean, he just was so meticulous and intentional about everything he did. I remember, I didn’t put this in the book either but I remember one day, he spent a lot of time in his recliner. I remember I was running around, getting lunch for him or drinks, like water and stuff, whatever he needed. Making sure he had his phone, his laptop if he was working. I was just always scurrying around just working on not only my business but helping him with is business, juggling our families and making sure our friends were updated, keeping up with the house, doing groceries, being careful of not bringing home COVID and there were just so much going on. Anyways, I remember, he intentionally grabs my hand, he’s sitting in the recliner, grabs my hand and he’s like, “Stop.” He said, “I miss my wife, I want to spend time with you, we need this time.” I kind of hop up on the recliner and I’m sitting on his lap and we’re just kind of looking at each other and he’s like, “I love you. Just stop, just spend time with me, it’s okay, I want this moment.” That is one moment to me that I really felt like everything just paused and we got a minute to just breathe and absorb what was really going on because this world is crazy and things are just moving so quickly, our brains just don’t have time to process what’s really going on sometimes. I’m really thankful that he called me out on just getting so consumed in the world and just taking that minute with him to breathe and share our love with each other and that’s a very monumental moment for me and I appreciate just that we were able to have that moment together.

[0:17:23] BB: Yeah, isn’t it interesting how in a season like that, sometimes, our brain goes into overdrive and it’s just do-do-do-do and what we need is to actually have quiet or to have just a moment like that where you’ve taken what’s actually happening. Because presence and being here and being now, with people is not only important but that’s just life. When we recognize that and live into those moments, it’s extremely beautiful but it reminds us, that’s why we’re here, we’re here for each other. Yeah, I can imagine the power of that moment, both then being in it but even now, to look back into a moment like that where we can be still and we can just take in this time together, I think that is extremely vital. Hopefully, for those that maybe aren’t even walking through a season like that but they’re listening to this, they’re going, “Oh yeah, here and now is precious, the time that I have with the people that I love and those that are around me like that’s what matters.” That’s really good to hear you express and give us that moment. I want to talk about your grieving process just a little bit more because there is another moment that I was reading, which is kind of that moment right after Cody goes to heaven and you talk about going numb, which to me reading that was like the most human – it is such a human response and I know people process differently. That is something that I just resonated with. Talk to me about that process and maybe some of those different feelings because I am sure it’s been all over the map.

[0:19:01] Jackie Eubanks: Yeah, so replaying it now, it was more beautiful than and I know that’s maybe a delicate word to use there but my husband was getting ready to go to heaven and the day just couldn’t have been more perfect for that if that was the way the Lord wanted it to go but I remember that morning we had a friend come over to the hospice house. Her name was Rita and Rita and I were sitting there praying with Cody and Cody was like in this unconscious state. He’s really in and out and Rita is just praying for him and we start saying how good God is and you know, if his time to go to heaven, I mean that’s beautiful. This world sucks and so if this is the Lord’s will then let it be peaceful and let it glorify Him and so as we’re talking about how good the Lord is, Cody starts raising his hands in the air and it’s like he’s worshiping even though he’s like in this unconscious state. Anyways, as soon as Cody’s hands dropped, the whole atmosphere changes. Again, everybody can read it in that chapter. I feel like I was very detailed in everything that happened. Probably missed some pieces and that’s fine but I spent probably just a month alone on that chapter because I didn’t feel like anything really did it justice and so before he passed, it felt so surreal and I had so much confidence that the Lord was just going to raise him out of that bed. I just knew and you couldn’t convince me otherwise that he was going to live. He didn’t live the way I wanted to like my flesh was kind of hoping for obviously him to just get up out of bed and walk but it was the spiritual aspect of it. He did get up and walk, he is alive, he is more alive than me and you and so the moment the nurse said, “There is no more heartbeat” I just couldn’t feel. It almost felt like my body was on fire. It felt like – and I mention in there, it’s very subtle but I mentioned how my eyes opened. I really felt like I wasn’t here anymore. I feel like part of me went up there to be with him and I got to see for a second nothing. I didn’t feel, I just didn’t feel. I don’t know how to explain it any better than that but it’s almost like my eyes opened to where I got to see the big picture. Cody didn’t get to bring anything with him. He didn’t get to bring our house with him, our dog with him, the cars with him, the business with me, me with him, anything. It was just such a surreal moment to where I’m like, “Wow, he didn’t even get to bring his wedding band with him” just nothing, just his soul and so I stepped – of course, I’m crying over him for a while and I stepped back and I looked at him and I’m like, “Wow, all these months everybody has been telling me he’s losing weight.” He doesn’t look like Cody, he looks depleted, his energy has gone down, just all the stuff and I never saw any of that. I just saw my stunning husband like my handsome husband. That’s all I saw but for the first time once he passed, I just saw what everybody else has been seeing like his shell was there but I knew his soul wasn’t there anymore and so I am just in a rage. I can’t even describe it really but I just let out this yell whenever he left, whenever his soul left and it just paralyzed my whole body and so I am trying to rip off my clothes because I’m sweating and just nothing felt comfortable. The atmosphere just did not feel comfortable, it’s like I was just so disgusted with not being able to go where he was and so I briefly remember my mom running in the room and she’s trying to hug me but I just could not even – I mean I just couldn’t even breathe. I felt so claustrophobic and so – I don’t even know. I just couldn’t function, none of my body could work or function but you know when I pulled myself together I walked outside and we did have several people who were there during Cody’s passing. Then what was also pretty amazing is the whole community had set up a time to come pray over Cody that afternoon. I think it was supposed to be around 5:00, 5:30 or six, something like that but a lot of people in the community were coming out to pray over the hospice home and for Cody and Cody passed around 4:00 and so by the time I pulled myself together and I walked outside people start gathering and of course, everybody had to tell them, “No, he just passed. There’s no need for this.” but there was just something so spiritual and I can’t put my hand on it but it was all the Lord. Every bit of it now looking back on it, sure my flesh was mortified but the Lord had His hand in everything that happened and He still does. I strongly believe that.

[0:23:58] BB: It’s amazing to hear you talk about it because there’s two sides to it. There is this very human expression of grief, which is so necessary because to ignore that would create like a state of maintained numbness, which is not good. You have to acknowledge the human side of what was happening and then there’s this other side that you’re talking about both like then the community being present, right? Right after this moment where then you’re like all these people are here, they’re going to pray but you are seeing this community that really cared about you. There’s this spiritual dynamic to what’s happening in that moment and so there is still this hopeful side. There is this faith side and having both of those present I think for a lot of people it’s hard to understand or imagine having both present at the same time and I think you described it really beautifully. That kind of leads to where I want to take this as we begin to start to wrap up but faith is clearly a big part of your life. It was a big part of Cody’s life and it is a huge part of this story. There is a ton of moments in this book where you’re, you know, it’s a sad. It can be difficult to read at times, worth reading but difficult and you walk through these hard days but one thing you said in chapter eight, you say: “Our faith and trust in God has exceeded what we ever thought possible. He reveals Himself to us daily in ways we may not have seen before. We are learning to determine what’s truly important in life” and so I just want to ask, how has tragedy and loss shaped your life like what you view as important and then the second part to that question is, how has tragedy and loss shaped your view of God?

[0:25:38] Jackie Eubanks: Those are great questions. I have always loved the Lord. I grew up in church and my family that was just a huge part of who we were is mom and dad just always brought it back to Christ. He is where we are now, He is where we are going to be in five years, ten years, eternity and so I’ve always grew up with a relationship with Christ but it wasn’t until I think I was around 18, 19 that it just really hit me like, “Wow, He is real. I know He’s real. I just want to shout Him from the rooftops.” Going through something like this, the best word I know how to phrase everything is temporary. This world is so temporary and I got to see that firsthand. Now in saying that, yeah, we’re supposed to enjoy our time here. We’re supposed to love one another and spread the goodness of the Lord because there’s so much darkness here. I mean, there is no sense in us not being able to spread his light and so just live each day like it’s your last. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Thankfully, there’s a tomorrow to wake up to but just give it your best every single day and just live how Christ would. Now, in saying that it’s super impossible. We’re all broken sinners, we’re all just dirty ugly sinners but that’s okay because Christ died for us. I believe Cody’s passing brought me closer to Christ just because I got to see like someone as invincible as him did not stay here long. We all wish he would have but he didn’t. The reality is we’re all going to pass and so, I like to believe that when I go to heaven, I do not want to go without him, without Christ, without my loved ones. I want to be where they are. I don’t want to – I just don’t want to suffer any longer than I already am and so I have no choice but to give it all to Christ because I do want to see Cody again. I know for a fact where he went. I do want to be with Jesus. I do want to be with all my family members and maybe friends that have passed but yeah, it definitely brought me closer to Christ. It just made me realize how temporary everything is, the media, COVID, just hate and violence, all this ugly stuff. It’s temporary, I see the big picture now. I know where we’re all headed. It’s prophesized in the Bible and so in my heart, it’s just a no-brainer just to lean into Him. I won’t be here too long because in all honesty, a day on earth or a hundred days on earth is like a second in heaven or something like that but I just like to think of it that way. If it won’t matter in ten years, why am I stressing it? Eternity is forever compared to here.

[0:28:27] BB: It’s interesting how those life and death situations, those big moments in our lives do seem to reframe things into what really matters and you can hear it outside of those moments and it can just sound life, “Oh that’s the thing that we always say” but there is something so clarifying about those moments and so it’s great to hear you say that and it is impactful obviously because of the season that you’ve walked through. Two more questions, cancer obviously impacts so many people. To those who have friends and family who are walking through a cancer diagnosis, any advice as to how we can best support those that are kind of walking through those extremely hard seasons?

[0:29:11] Jackie Eubanks: It’s so different for everybody. It impacts families on totally different levels and I think grieving is such a unique experience. Personally, I just think patience is a really big thing. Like we mentioned before living in the moment because you just really don’t know when it’s your last moment, again, the timeframes are different. The spiritual levels are different, the dynamics of the relationships are different. I mean it’s just so unique but when you give it all to God and it is not going to be perfect. I mean it’s really not. I have my days, my moments, my hours, my weeks, my months where it’s just a terrible mentality, whatever but if you’re patient with yourself and you bring it back to center and you realize what the big picture is, it’s all going to be okay in the end as long as you are just surrendering who you are and what you are for the cause of Christ. Again cancer, whether it’s cancer or a car accident or an overdose or Lord forbid, a suicide, whatever it is, it’s not going to make it any easier but the cancer journey in itself is just it can be a super long drawn out process or it can be very short and so just love your loved ones, let them know you’re here to support them whether it’s how you agree or disagree. Life is just too short to I guess be sad and spend those moments just in the dark. We’re called to come together and be together and love on one another and I just think that’s really important. I guess my advice to other families who are grieving or going through the cancer process, just be patient with yourselves because it’s just as hard on you as it is on the cancer patient. Of course, Cody was so stoic, I never could read him or I never really truly knew how he was feeling. I’m sure he was scared but he never told me he was. I rarely ever saw him cry so I just didn’t know what he was thinking but again, that was his way of dealing with it. That was his grief and you start grieving way before someone passes, so in a sense, I started grieving when Cody got diagnosed and even before and so that’s different when he passed is when a lot of people start grieving because it hit them then and again, people have different ways of dealing with it. If you have a loved one who got diagnosed with cancer, some people may resort to isolation. Some people may just want to be with people 24/7, some people may resort to drinking, some people may resort to praying more, it’s just such a unique thing that I don’t think anyone could cash judgment on what another is doing because at the end of the day, they’re probably doing what is best for them and just trying to take it one day at a time step-by-step and just move forward with the cards they’ve been dealt in the situation.

[0:32:01] BB: That patience is the right word there because there’s so many unique circumstances and so that’s great. As we wrap up today Jackie, how do you want people to remember Cody? What comes to mind when you think about him?

[0:32:15] Jackie Eubanks: He was a giver, he was a lover, he was just all-around incredible. He was so quirky in a sense that he was so funny, super analytical, just met people where they are in life whether you were a mechanic or a NBA basketball player, I don’t know, he just loved everyone equally and whether you were poor or wealthy, black or white, Cuban, Asian, purple, pink, whatever, he just loved and he determined what was in your heart before looking at your exterior and he got to know people and he listened and he cared and he didn’t always have to be the loudest in the room. He wanted to learn who others were before basing an opinion about them. I loved that he volunteered not only with our track and field athletes but he was a huge asset to this community. He served all across the board. He just was gentle and kind and just all the words in the Bible that you can categorize someone as. Of course, he wasn’t perfect. None of us are perfect but he was just such a giver and I think it is safe to say that he made a huge impact on not only me but just everyone he came in contact with. Based on people I’ve talked to, his story made an impact on dozens, if not thousands of people that didn’t even know him just because of word of mouth and just the reputation he had. He was hard not to love. The second you met him, you fell in love with him. His charming self, I mean, that smile, that beautiful smile it just radiated and you could tell by looking at his eyes that he just loves Jesus and he did his best every day to walk in His faith and just live how we think Jesus would want him to have lived. He was a good man and he is very missed. I just really appreciate that I am able to help continue his story.

[0:34:14] BB: There is going to be so many that will hear that story now with the release of this book and so thank you for taking time to write and I am glad that it was part and is part of your process. I’m glad that more people will get to read it now that this book is released and Jackie, for those that want to connect with you further, where can people find you and reach out to you online?

[0:34:41] Jackie Eubanks: Yeah, absolutely. I have a Facebook, again, I have a ton of names so it’s Jacklyn Nicole Wilde Eubanks. I just couldn’t drop any of my names, it is part of who I am and so I left it all but you can connect with me on messenger there or I’m pretty active on Instagram. It’s @jackq_wilde, yeah, you guys are more than welcome to connect with me on either platforms. I would love to talk to you all about not only what I’m going through but what you’re going through. Maybe we can collab or help each other out because we’re not meant to walk through this world alone. We all have a story and it’s all worth being shared and told and I just think it’s really important that we understand that this world is not always easy. It is not a walk in the part, it is not meant to be, otherwise there wouldn’t be a reason for Christ’s return and so yeah, you’re not alone. I never want you to think you’re alone because even though someone one the outside looks to have it all together, I promise you they don’t. We all poop and pee and at the end of the day, it’s just again, we have to take what we’ve been dealt and we have to find a way to keep walking forward.

[0:35:56] BB: Well Jackie, thanks so much for talking some time to speak with us today about your book.

[0:36:00] Jackie Eubanks: Yeah, thank you so much for having me. I really appreciate it and I’m so thankful for all that you guys have done. Thanks so much Benjie.

[0:36:12] BB: Thanks for joining us for this episode of Author Hour. You can find, My Cody: His cancer, our faith and God’s love by Jackie Eubanks, on Amazon. A transcript of this episode as well as our previous episodes is available at authorhour.co. For more Author Hour, subscribe to this podcast on your favorite subscription service. Thanks for joining us, we’ll see you next time. Same place, different author.